What Brave Looks Like

My husband walked into his office yesterday and turned in his notice. Two short weeks from now he will no longer be employed in a "secure" job. A couple of weeks from now our medical insurance will stop and the bills will keep going. No, he doesn't have a better job offer that he has accepted. At least not a job offer that the world would call better. Yes, we know that the economy isn't good. Yes, we know that we have a child and that to the world this is an irresponsible and foolish move. We're aware of the upside down approach to life we're taking. We've counted the cost and well... 

We just think that God is bigger.

I would be lying if I didn't feel a bit of a lurch in my stomach over the whole grand adventure. This year of fearless is putting my will to the test in enormous ways. How badly do I want to live fearlessly? How badly do I want God-shaped bravery to consume my life? We're talking big, God-sized stuff, but again, isn't all of this life God-sized stuff if we're honest? Isn't the reason that we can walk into each moment with confidence because God is there in each moment and has been since before time?

This is a dream that we've been holding close for a few years now. The realization of a dream that was birthed in West Africa and has been growing through hard days and the even harder soil of our hearts here on the East Coast of the U.S. of A. We let go of the American dream the last time we quit jobs and packed five bulging suitcases for Liberian shores. We traded the idea of white picket fences and apple pie for zinc-roofed shanties and rice with greens and that trade changed us to our soul's core. It shouldn't have surprised us that the idea of coming home and settling into business as usual was not as easy as it had once been, not even possible. The vestiges of the American dream were decorating the corners of our hearts like macrame and wood paneling. It just had to go. What has replaced it is a desire to do life differently, to live life on the edges of faith, hope and love and to trust Him with every ounce of it. 

I'm guilty of wanting God's will to come wrapped in a tidy little box. A box with set parameters and crisp dimensions makes me feel safe and secure about the future, a future that I think I have some (imaginary) semblance of control over, but reality is that I want to dream big dreams. I want to dream God-sized dreams. Dreams that are so big that they will fail unless God shows up big. This dream, we've held close and dared to keep dreaming when it seemed impossible, is becoming a reality and God is going to have to show up big for it to work.

I know that someone is reading this and wondering how we can walk into the uncertain with any hope that we won't be broke and land ourselves in the poor house in six months. All I can say is that God promises and He NEVER goes back on a promise. God doesn't forsake His children and those counted righteous by His Son will never be found begging for bread. Some of you are shaking your heads and saying, "I'd never be able to step out with such faith." This move, this radical stepping out in faith, has nothing to do with us. Folks, we reached the end of our rope a long time ago. The rope was frayed and broken and we decided that God's rope even if it doesn't look long enough or strong enough at times is the better choice. We reached the end of our reaching for security and even though we don't know what the future holds we aren't looking back. We're only straining forward toward the cross and toward a God who glories to show up in gigantic ways for the sake of His great name.

We've been taught to think that brave is when you do something hard or risky and reap a reward for yourself or someone else. I don't know if our reward for this bit of faith bravery will be seen on this side of heaven. I don't know if we'll ever have anything to "show" for this life lived trusting desperately in a God who does not fail. We're just a little family with a God-sized dream. A little family that has decided that the American dream is far too small for us. Brave often looks like blind faith, even foolish, and today it looks like my husband quitting his job because He believes in a great big Gospel and a great big God.

We only look brave because we're trusting a God who is too big to fail.

Visit our family blog for more information on where we're going, what we're doing and how you can be a part of making "things hoped for" a reality for the ministry ahead.